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You may have noticed that this month, I have not posted an Expert Overshare or One Overshare. This is because both of these require so much research and I simply haven’t had the time. Between work, this newsletter and a fellowship I am taking part in, I am in a wobble. So July & August will be the same. Adulting, Growing & Stuff and Life Bloopers will continue getting updates! Moving on…
"When you started creating, had you already defined your community, or did that happen during your journey or somewhere after some success?"
"Nobuhle, you need to leave people alone. Leave people alone and JUST do the work! You are holding on to this community idea because you do not want to do the work."
What you just read is an interaction that happened between a very successful creator and me. The creator had just shared their journey as a creator, and we were all impressed by her work. As all events go, there was a Q&A session. The question highlighted above was my second one regarding community (audience). Before I knew it, the speaker was a bit louder than before, and the tone had changed. My brain received that as a scolding of some sort, and it left me a little perplexed.
However, this interaction left me with two lessons.
You do not know who you are speaking to
This one goes out to all my girls who get speaking engagements in the creative world or wherever. Keep in mind that you are talking to strangers, and boundaries are important in such settings. Watch the words that you say. In the response I received, there was an assumption that I was NOT putting in any work. How did a question about defining a target audience reflect on my work ethic?
I remember being very tempted to lay out the work I put in as a creative. I wanted to fight for my honour because, over the years, I have worked my ass off. I have fallen off the wagon and gotten back up. I felt both insulted and demeaned. My defences were up, but as usual, I laughed it off with rage sitting at my throat. She taught us a lot in that hour but left a bitter taste in my mouth. It almost wiped out the knowledge she had shared with us.
The point I am driving at is, do not get personal with people. When sitting on a panel or standing before an audience, educate with kindness. It is ok to pause and think about something before responding right away. Ask follow-up questions to understand better if need be. Unless the event theme is personal experiences, do not speak on people's lives based on your assumptions.
I am because you are
In the Ndebele language, there is a saying that goes, 'Umuntu ngumuntu ngabantu,' which means I am because you are. The idea that one can create without an audience in mind is flawed to me, and I stand on that. Every successful business has a defined target audience.
After the session, I questioned if I was crazy for asking questions about defined audiences. I later laughed because I realised that the organisation that put the event together had its target audience defined in its name, African women. This very newsletter already has a defined audience, 'young women figuring it out one mistake at a time.'
I was not wrong to ask, nor am I wrong for knowing who I want to speak to. As humans, we aren't designed for isolation. We need community, and spaces to belong to, and I hope we do away with the shame of searching for them and creating them. Slowly, we are driving ourselves into extreme isolation in the name of being individualistic badasses. STOP!
The gag is that not having a defined audience delayed my success. I started projects and stopped midway. I didn't know who I wanted the message to reach, which made it harder to create. It felt like I was screaming into the abyss, hoping someone would scream back. And that is why I would not encourage creatives to build without a defined community/audience.
Our journeys will be different, and that is ok. If the idea of defining an audience stifles your creativity, leave it alone and do what works. I am sure, eventually, your community will define itself, and you will fine-tune your craft to serve your community. Sometimes, we define our target audience, and the response comes from people different to those we expected. In such cases, we either redefine our audience or tweak our content to include the new-found community. It is all a part of the process.
Reminder: People are waiting for your story.
To creating, finding our communities and being kind! *clink clink*
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I read it, you might enjoy it too.
If you haven’t heard about Smallstack, let me be the one to introduce you to it.
is creating a library for Small Substack creators. Get a Backstage Pass to Smallstack has some information about what is currently happening. Stalk their publication to learn more. (I think they are hiring)Speaking of, have you tapped into Unlocked? In this post, We’re Launching Unlocked,
explains how it works and why YOU (writers) should take part in it.- takes time out every week to plug African writers to African writing opportunities. Check out June Opportunities for African Writers.
I am grateful for the mention! Reading this newsletter helped me put things I've been considering in more perspective. Thank you for 'oversharing'.
This was such a delightful read Nobuhle.
I am just so sorry about your experience with the panelist and how she misconstrued your character and work ethic. I hope you’ll not internalise it and remind yourself, as you did in the post, she didn’t know you and had zero context.
You gave such a balanced perspective on defining one’s audience while not being prescriptive and giving us the space to still figure out what would feel and resonate better for us.